#She’s far to distracted by the fact that a legend is a teacher’s assistant right now to process the last part of Wo’s sentence

[ask-team-grim]

In response to this

Dravena: Wait, so you’re basically just a glorified schoolteacher’s assistant?

Dravena: I thought legends did more interestin’ stuff than that.

Dravena: Uh, no offense of course!

Dravena: But like, what do ya even like to help teach about? I’m sorry, it’s just…surely there’s more interestin’ stuff you’d like to do with your abilities, right?

Dravena: I mean every legend’s got abilities! That’s what makes ‘em legendary.

//@the-feral-one

[crescentmoonrider]

Hey, what's one gotta do to get some info on dark time-line Minato, if he ever finds out his team is semi-alive and also why the hell anyone thought letting the snake guys be in charge of children was a good idea? Maybe some cuter stuff on team inadequacy issues too, if you don't mind

Your offering has been duly processed. Thank you.

So about that dark timeline Minato. One thing you need to understand is that this Minato has lost his entire team. Obito died in Kannabi and he couldn’t save him, Kakashi died and his body got desecrated, Obito’s eye stolen, and only the Sage of the Six Paths knows what Kiri did to Rin. (Minato has some idea about that, but he manages to keep the thoughts away most of the time.)

Minato has failed as a teacher. All his kids are dead. Minato has failed, and he refuses to fail anyone anymore, refuses to let anyone go through what he did. He will protect Konoha, will protect the children and the future of the village.

And most importantly, he will ensure no one starts a war with Konoha ever again. (Danzo quickly loses relevance.)

This would be bad enough as is, but things get even worse when Rin and Obito escape from Madara. See, their escape was far from sneaky. They actually more or less made Graveyard’s Mountain explode. (Or well, Rin made Graveyard’s Mountain explode and Obito kamui-ed them both away.)

It just so happens that a Konoha team was passing nearby at the time and decided to investigate. And there, buried in rocks and giant bones, laid Madara’s dead body.

Since Madara was more or less a freak of nature at this point in his life, between the face-titty and the weird root-like things in his back, Konoha quickly decides to have a specialist examine the body. Namely Orochimaru.

At that time, Orochimaru was still very much bitter about seeing the hat go to some brat instead of him, and didn’t like Minato at all. He buried himself in his research, careful enough to not leave traces or bodies behind, and when Madara’s body was presented to him it was like a gift from the heavens.

Madara was old, much older than any person Orochimaru had ever seen, and he had managed to somehow find a way around the compatibility issues with the First Hokage’s cells, something Orochimaru still couldn’t figure out. There was chakra residue on his corpse too, heavy and corrupted, much like a bijuu’s, but the report didn’t mention anything about a giant monster.

Orochimaru was intrigued, more curious than ever before.

And more surprisingly, the Hokage brat seemed just as invested in that research. In fact, Minato was helping Orochimaru, offering theories, assisting with the maths that Orochimaru never grew to like. Minato got it. Got him. The curiosity, the fever of research, the seemingly-unattainable goal behind the quest for knowledge.

Orochimaru wants to fight death, and so does Minato in his own way. (Minato doesn’t help with Orochimaru’s more questionable projects, but he doesn’t ask where some of his data comes from either.)

Orochimaru is entirely loyal to Minato, and Minato trusts him.

That last sentence is one of the reasons behind Orochimaru being trusted with team 7, including Minato’s own flesh and blood, as well as the child of Kushina’s best friend.

Another reason is that Orochimaru can help the kids reach their maximum potential. He knows sealing at a high level and will be able to teach Naruto even when away on missions, where Kushina can’t help. He is familiar with the sharingan, and his mastery of ninjutsu will be very helpful to Sasuke once he awakens his eyes and gets to copy the techniques.

Sakura is kind of the outlier here, as there is no parent to please and no clan technique to teach. But she was the first in academy for theoretical knowledge, and Orochimaru knows how to reach out to people with booksmarts. (Later, the discovery of her natural chakra control will make her a perfect student for Kabuto’s techniques.)

All of team 7 feels inadequate in some way.

Naruto in regards to his parents, especially his father. As said in this post, he has trouble with control. He also has trouble with focusing. Academy was very hard on him, as it required him to sit down and do nothing. He was lucky to be interrogated on substitution for his exam. (In truth, no one wanted to fail the Hokage’s son, so they asked him to demonstrate the one basic technique he mastered.)

Ironically enough, he can do rather advanced sealing even though it has a reputation for being extremely complex. Sealing is also not in the academy program, sadly. But even though he is an Uzumaki, and even though both his parents are sealing geniuses, Naruto has to work twice as hard to even understand how things work. Sealing doesn’t come easy to him. He can’t skip steps, has to think everything through, combine seals through addition before going back to take out the redundancies.

(Naruto is 12, and has mastered some advanced sealing. He knows how to make his own and knows to get creative and think outside the box. But when his father tries to explain things to him, he can’t understand, because they don’t think the same. His mother knows how to talk in a way he can follow, but it all seems so natural to her that he feels like a fraud.)

(One day Naruto will manage to control his chakra perfectly, one day he will make the golden chains, one day he will be a worthy Uzumaki, one day he will stand on his own and be someone more than the Hokage’s son.)

Sasuke also has family issues, and Itachi makes up half of them. Itachi graduated at 7, Itachi awakened his sharingan at 8, Itachi made ANBU at 11, Itachi made captain at 13. And father was so proud, always, always, always. Sasuke graduates at 12, already failing in all of Itachi’s steps.

It was always a game of catching up, one that Sasuke never won, not even once. He tried to cheat too, asking Shisui for help, and Shisui did help. (Unlike Itachi, Itachi keeps leaving Sasuke behind, never looking back. It’s unfair that Sasuke’s cousin supports him more than his own brother. It’s unfair that Sasuke’s father never looks at him with the pride he reserves for Itachi.)

(Sasuke is 12, and mastered the Great Fireball in a week. He hasn’t awakened the sharingan yet, but he has a large array of techniques, and his kenjutsu is, by Shisui’s word, pretty good. He chases after his brother and his father’s affection, not paying any mind to the admiration of his peers or the proud look in his mother’s eyes. All he sees is what he doesn’t have.)

(One day Sasuke will awaken his sharingan, one day he will surpass Itachi, one day he will make his father proud, one day he will be the greatest Uchiha, greater even than Itachi or Shisui or even the legends from old times, one day his name will be remembered and Itachi’s will be forgotten.)

Sakura fails the bells-test. No one ever tells her outright, but she knows she has. Orochimaru grabs her hair and cuts it off shoddily, and she can’t do a thing about it. She cries in frustration as Orochimaru taunts her. (He tells her incompetent ninja aren’t worthy of long hair, tells her she is lucky he chose to let her live, and when Naruto’s trap activates and Sasuke steals the bells, she knows she has failed.

Naruto tries to comfort her and pretend they needed her to distract Orochimaru, and Sasuke ensures her hair looks like something, and she should be so happy that he even looks at her. But all she hears are lies, and Sasuke cuts off the hair she grew for him like it means nothing, because it never meant anything but the stupid dreams of a stupid girl. Her teammates are a team already, and she doesn’t fit, is nothing more than a walking academy textbook, and what little anger she doesn’t feel at Orochimaru she directs at herself.

(Sakura is 12 and in a single day she lost all sense of belonging. Orochimaru is cruel, but he was right, and she will change that. She absorbs all he teaches, drinks up every single drop of knowledge like water in a desert, or maybe like poison. She doesn’t look at her teammates, looks past them as she aims to catch up to them, and suddenly she notices everything she didn’t before, the way Naruto’s eyes darken when the Hokage is mentioned, the way Sasuke doesn’t talk about his family. She wonders how she missed that, in the years she spent admiring Sasuke, but then she remembers she didn’t care about him, not really, not as a person so much as an ideal.)

(One day she will be a great ninja, one day she will make Orochimaru take back everything he said, one day she will look at herself with pride, one day she will understand why her team is suffering so much and she will change that, and the world will remember her name.)

Team 7 is a mess, but they grow stronger with adversity. All are starved for recognition, and they push each other up in every thing. Naruto and Sasuke have the longest-standing bond, they work together like a clockwork, pulling out crazy plan after crazy plan, and Sakura is here to ensure the plan actually works and all of them make it out alive. She completes them.

[malecsecretsanta]

Merry Christmas, @magicmagnus!

There was never a lifetime where Magnus didn’t love Alec and Alec didn't love Magnus.

In some lives, their love was drastic and sudden and intrusive. In others, it was casual and comfortable and smooth.

Even when they didn’t find each other, he still felt the aching need to be complete, to find his other half.

Magnus and Alec were not always lovers. They were also friends and coworkers and warriors and enemies and just two people who happened to look in the right direction at the right time.

Sometimes they found each other in whispered tales beside ancient temples or shared smiles beneath sunsets in Greece. Other times it was in a small library with steaming cups of tea or a Persian jewelry shop filled with intricate pieces that would look absolutely lovely on Alec.

No matter what, Magnus always loved Alec and Alec always loved Magnus.

--------------------------------------

1

Alec’s wings stretched out far behind him, both a blessing and a curse. They were comparable to dark ink, with long black feathers and wiry muscles. They were as beautiful as they were irritating.

Magnus’ wings were smaller but just as powerful. They were bright flames shaped into smooth lines and tendons, elegant and strong. Many might say they must have belonged to Icarus, a phoenix born from ash and dust.

They flew over the grounds, high enough in the sky that the people walking below looked even more minuscule. Something about drifting like this, together, felt surreal and dreamlike. It felt as though the universe belonged to them and in these moments, it did.

Magnus did an overly dramatic turn in the air, making Alec laugh. In response, Alec grabbed his hand and twirled him.

They plummeted towards the grass, Magnus landing gently on his back and Alec encircling him with his arms.

“Have I ever told you that you are living fire, my love?” Magnus asked, his voice like honey.

“Have I ever burnt you?”

Magnus choked out a gentle laugh. “Even if you did, it wouldn’t change a thing and you know it.”

“I suppose that is true, isn’t it? Have I ever told you that you remind me of starlight?”

“All the time.” He looked at the other man. “Have I ever outshone you?”

Alec held him closer. “You could never. We shine together, always.”

Magnus glanced at him, feeling an overwhelming sense of love and gratitude for the man beside him.

“Do you think we will be stars? After we die, I mean.”

Alec thought about it, fingers pulling idly at some grass. “I think that you will be the sun and I will be a planet, constantly orbiting around you with no risk of colliding because everything will be perfect.”

“That sounds lovely.”

“That’s why I believe it.”

Magnus intertwined their hands. “Do you want to go somewhere?”

“Of course. Lead the way, love.”

That night, stories were told about the two lovers who flew towards the sun, swooping through the sky beside the stars. The people spoke of angels soaring and laughing and holding each other until morning. And eventually, when legends and truths weaved together until they couldn’t be divided, the two men would just smile because they knew their time was infinite.

--------------------------------------

2

When Alec showed up at his door, Magnus was surprised. He had offered his assistance months ago and had never actually expected the offer to be taken up. Nevertheless, he was more than happy to help.

After giving Alec what was supposed to be a reassuring smile, he simply moved out of the way and gestured for the younger man to enter. “Come in. Please make yourself at home.”

After mumbling a quick “thanks,” Alec rushed inside, almost as if he didn't want to be seen near Magnus. When the other man closed the front door of the ridiculously extravagant loft, at least in some people’s opinions, he seemed to relax slightly.

“Are you okay? You seem a bit… tense.”

Alec glanced around before answering. Everything in the apartment seemed so fancy with its expensive fabrics and marble countertops and exotic pieces of art probably bought in trips all around the world. He felt like he was intruding in a home so beautiful. “Uh, yeah. I’m fine.”

Magnus just kept looking at him, seeing right through the lie. “You can talk to me anytime if you want to. I know we’ve only met a couple times, but I’m here if you need me.” Although this was true, he felt as though he had known Alec forever. Something about him was so familiar. “Of course, you don’t have to. I’m sorry if I overstepped. I do that sometimes.”

“No, I appreciate it. Thanks.”

“You’re very welcome. Now, what was it you needed? Training for your magic?”

Alec sighed. “Yeah, if it’s not too much trouble. It’s been hard enough hiding it from my parents. They hate warlocks. They would throw a fit if they found out. I just want to work on controlling it, so I don’t lash out or whatever.”

“Your parents don’t know?” The Lightwoods always knew everything, as they were slightly too involved in everyone’s lives. This was very surprising to Magnus.

Alec just shook his head. “I don’t really want to talk about this. Would it be okay if we just started the lesson?”

“Of course.”

Magnus began to show Alec some basic training exercises, things he had learned when he first discovered his abilities. His had first shown when he was still a young boy, whereas Alec had been almost seventeen. Now he was nineteen and felt rather silly being taught as though he were nine years old.

This said, he was already showing small signs of improvement. It could have to do with the fact that he was paying very close attention to Magnus, but it was for his skills, he reasoned.

After several hours, they called it a night and Alec was just grabbing his jacket when Magnus stopped him at the door.

“Would you mind if I gave you my number? Just for future lessons, of course.”

Alec really hoped that wasn't the case, wanting it to be more than just lessons. What he felt for Magnus certainly could not be applied to any teachers he knew. “Sure. Maybe we could get some coffee sometime?”

“Yes, that would be lovely. I’ll see you around, Alexander.” Magnus was beaming, wishing that the other man would never leave. “Text me.”

“I will, I promise.”

He slipped the piece of paper with Magnus’ number into his pocket, double checking that it wouldn’t fall out. Before he left, he gave the other man a smile and realized that for the first time in a while, he actually felt excited about something. After all, Alec didn’t even like coffee, he just liked Magnus.

On the walk home, Alec could only think of two things. The way that Magnus called him “Alexander” and the fact that he loved it.

--------------------------------------

3

The air reeked of smoke and the awful scent of dead bodies. The ground was littered with soldiers and bullets and abandoned weapons, lost in the midst of fighting.There was an odd feeling situated in every person’s chest, unsettling and grim. It wasn’t pretty, but neither was war.  

Alec hated this, seeing his country being destroyed and his people slaughtered. He felt helpless and like he should be doing more.

Currently, however, he had no time to think or do anything else other than fight. People were coming at him from all sides, bullets flying past his head. Alec needed to keep his guard up.

A woman with a heavy blade came up behind him, using his moment of distraction to her advantage. Before she could strike, she was knocked down by a heavy blow. Alec only then realized she had even been behind him. He was quickly distracted again, but this time it was not his fault.

The person who had protected him was, simply put, beautiful. It was a man who looked like the stars. And his eyes were remarkable. They looked like Alec had seen them before, but he would remember seeing someone like him.

Their eyes met and something like recognition flashed in the man’s face.

“Do I know you?” The man asked with some longing in his voice.

Alec considered his answer. “No, I don’t think so.”

“Right. Well, we better get back to fighting, I suppose. We have a nation to save after all.”

He cleared his throat. “Right.”

The man began to walk away until Alec cried out, “Wait! I didn’t catch your name?”

“It’s Magnus, Magnus Bane.” He smiled. “And yours?”

“Alec. Lightwood. Alec Lightwood.”

“See you around, Lightwood.”

He cleared his throat. “See you around.” It came out as more of a question than a statement but Alec was far too occupied to worry about that.

Because standing there in the middle of a battlefield, in the middle of a war, Alec could feel the truth in the words shared with the man who resembled the stars.

Magnus.

Magnus Bane.

He couldn't wrap his head around how he knew that name. All he knew is that under whatever circumstances, he would see Magnus again and he was looking forward to it.

--------------------------------------

+1

Magnus held on tighter to Alec’s hand, knowing this would be the last time he ever would again. This lifetime had not been fair and they both knew it. Nothing could have prepared them for this.

When Magnus had started to feel sick, he thought it would be curable, just something the doctor would diagnose quickly and prescribe some sort of medication for. This was not the case. The doctors came and went, sending specialists and yet no one could diagnose his illness.

Then one day, they started to call it an epidemic, a crisis. One that was affecting other men like him. And all anyone knew is that he didn’t have much longer.

Now he lay on the hospital bed, feeling clammy and feverish. Magnus’ body had been shaking for days and his whole body ached.

And through it all, Alec had held him and whispered soft words into his ears.

“You know I love you, right?” He had said, “Nothing will ever change that.”

And Magnus knew this. But, oh, did he wish it didn’t hurt so much.

By this point, Magnus barely had it in him to reply, but still tried. “I-I love you, so much.” He figured he was most likely crying, but he couldn't feel the tears. “And I’m s-so sorry for all of th-this.”

“Hey, hey. You have absolutely nothing to apologize for. You’re my everything, my love, everything. Alright?”  Magnus gave a tired nod and shifted against his lover.

He finally looked at him. “I’m scared.”

“I know. So am I. But you’re going to be fine, the doctors will find some way to save you and we’ll live a happy life together, I promise.”

They both knew that wouldn’t be the case, yet the sentiment was appreciated.

“No, it-it’s not that,” Magnus wasn’t worried about himself, even in his final moments. “I’m not scared of dying. I’m scared of you not being okay when I do.”

“If you die, I won’t be okay. I couldn’t be. But I will try to be alright if only to honor you.”

Magnus smiled sadly. “What if this is it? What if we never see each other again?”

Alec looked at him. “I’ll find you. In another life, I’ll find you and nothing will go wrong. We’ll be together always and everything will be alright. Nothing can stop me from finding you and from loving you with all that I am.”

Magnus was now fully aware of his tears. “In another life,” his voice echoed, full of sorrow and grief for what was to come. His green eyes were slowly drooping shut and he eventually drifted to sleep.

They never unclasped hands, and Alec felt the exact moment his lover’s went limp in the middle of the night. He felt something break inside him. He knew this was not what they deserved, that they were dealt an unlucky card this time around. He also knew he would see Magnus again in the next lifetime and that he would love him even more if that was possible.

--------------------------------------

There was never a lifetime where Magnus didn't love Alec and Alec didn't love Magnus.

They were always destined to be together, perhaps it was even fate.

Whatever it was, they were grateful.

Their lives intertwined, their hearts beat together.

Everything was how it was meant to be.

[blyanten]

THE DUCK AVENGER PK2: #4 MEMORY LINES

It’s Stella’s birthday! And Rupert has no idea what to give her, despite having bought enough gifts to fill a shelf in his locker. The man needs to relax.

He asks Donald for help to find a good gift, but Donald is distracted by some work happening outside. There’s some people working on an antenna, including Anymore Boring, and surely Everett wouldn’t send one of his personal assistants unless it was important.

Anymore is also annoying the actual workers, because Everett has given his own personal instructions on how this job is supposed to be done, and it goes against the ten years of experience the workers have.

Donald didn’t get any of that as he’s too far away, but Rupert interrupts his staring, asking if he’s still with him. He goes on to say that Donald has a girlfriend, so surely, he knows what to get on an occasion like this.

Because if one woman likes something, surely another one will as well. There’s a reason this guy is single, despite being hung up on a woman who’s so into him she tolerates repeated instances of him shoving himself up against a window and drooling at her.

Donald tells him to forget Daisy, asking what he got Stella the previous years.

Yeah… though I think he’s getting somewhere, notice how Stella’s outfit gets fancier every year.

Rupert and Donald are in fact finished for the day, but Donald still doesn’t get to focus on what Anymore’s doing. First Rupert distracts him, and then shouting can be heard from the mall. They go back in, getting to the electronics store before the guards currently on shift, to find an old lady smashing up the place with a umbrella.

I appreciate the detail on the umbrella here. You can tell that thing is going to be ruined.

They take her down, thought she lands a blow on Rupert’s head. This is when the actual security guards show up, acting more like emergency personal. The old lady doesn’t remember anything, but Donald makes note of the incident and the man with long grey hair and a green coat that was taking notes.

Not suspicious at all, right?

It’s not the first incident though. So far a plumber has blown up fifteen hydrant and a postman set eighty mailbags on fire. While Donald ponders this, Rupert is sharing his romantic woes and failed attempts at asking Stella out. From the sound of it, the problem is that he’s not actually asking.

Damn right it does.

Donald, not actually thinking about Rupert’s problems, goes with it anyway, and tells with him it’s time to be honest with Stella. Also, he’ll deal with the gift. Rupert thanks him, claiming he wouldn’t know what to do without him.

This is a great panel.

Donald goes on patrol, having gotten used to relocating every night. This night, he’s been hiding in a Duckmall mascot. It turns out to be an easy night as far as finding trouble goes, since the sound of sirens is pretty much the first thing he hears.

This time, it’s a guy threatening to jump of a building. And just for fun, he’s wearing a bomb. People panic, the guy jumps and the Avenger grabs him right out of the air.

Sure, because if One told you to let the guy fall, you’d have let him become street pizza. Sure.

The bomb turns out to be fake, it was all a show. A quick chat with the cops also reveal that the guy was squeaky clean, no reason to think he’d ever do something like this.

The Avenger turns around and grey hair/green coat is back.

I keep getting distracted by the guy in the orange t-shirt. Damn, son, might want to focus on something other than the chest muscles in your next workout.

While it’s not impossible that some people are just unlucky enough to end up in two different incidents in the same day, especially not loud and messy ones guaranteed to draw an audience, the Avenger is feeling a bit short on ideas and decides to follow him.

Grey hair is named Hired Squarie and works at Duckburg University as a professor in Sociology of Urban Legends.

Considering Duckburg, I feel this explains his chill.

He also has some questions about emotion sucking extraterrestrial vampires, which I appreciate on a continuity and a “no, you actually can’t cover that up 100%” level, but the Avenger isn’t interested in talking. Not about that anyway.

So the prof. invites him down into his secret archive, complete with a hidden entrance behind the bookshelf. The archive is gigantic, so presumably it’s a quirk left over from the building’s previous owner.

The prof has also done research on every person who’s recently shown signs of disequilibrium, putting it mildly, and guess what they have in common?

Yep, they all worked for Everett Ducklair.

Which brings us to this scene!

Liathcat called Everett the King of Creepiness, and he earns the title in this scene.

Listen, by the time it seems reasonable to install a one way mirror in your daughter’s bedroom and watch her sleep, at least one of you should be in the hands of professionals. Note that I don’t say what kind of professionals.

When you have more money than God, you can find a better way to keep an eye on your kid than this. Come on.

Anyhow, while Juniper wakes up and gets dressed (no, he’s not watching that part), Everett does a vaguely menacing monologue about how she looks like her mom (please… stop. This is sooo not the time or place for that kind of talk, no matter how true) and how he’s trying to be a good father for both her and Korinna. 

That’s why he took them away from their mother.

Back to the Avenger, who is trying to break into Ducklair Tower. This time it’s actually pretty easy, which seems weird, considering how it usually goes, but he gets to Everett’s office without incident.

Everett isn’t there, but Birgit Q is.

Are you trying to claim that chair is comfortable?

She claims ignorance, but the piles of papers on the desk proves she’s lying. She gives in, telling the Avenger that they’ve noticed both the incidents and the connection, but beyond working for Everett, there isn’t one. They worked on different projects, in different departments and never had any contact.

But, hey, if the Avenger thinks he’s better than her, he can take the information and knock himself out.

He does.

And then heads straight for Duckmall because he’s late again. He’s also forgotten Stella’s present. After considering a power drill, jewelry, and other option, he goes for perfume, and manages to buy it before running into Rupert.

Rupert is grateful, and takes the present straight to Stella.

Donald’s problems are not over, however, as someone’s noticed his incursion in the Duckmall mascot, and Fitzroy is on his way to check it out. Donald offers to go, but for some reason this is worth fighting over. 

I guess the entrance is really boring.

While Donald runs to hide his equipment, Stella opens her present and finds anti-wrinkle cream for aged skin. So after running up every stair in Duckmall, Donald now has to deal with that.

That’s one hell of a “I’m surrounded by idiots” face. Or, y’know, he’s tired, but I like my interpretation better.

Donald takes Stella aside and tells her Rupert chose that cream because he wants to be near her until she actually has use of it. It’s a very symbolic gift.

See, this is what happens when you actually make a move.

Stella melts and accepts the invitation to watch a movie. Rupert is on cloud nine, but Donald has no time to listen to his thanks as Angus is on TV, because a teacher has taken a train filled with schoolkids hostage.

That... didn’t actually escalate fast, considering that explosions and fire have already happened off-panel.

Angus tries to interview a cop by claiming that the parents have a right to know. The cop points out that the parents have already been informed, because duh.

Birgit shows up, along with a team of mercenaries, and attack the train from the other end, where no one can see them. 

In an armor with ED written on it. Secrecy, not found.

The Avenger shows up and stops them, refusing to let them play games with the lives of children.

Unfortunately, it’s his appearance that makes the teacher start shooting. Thankfully, through the roof. Birgit and the Avenger springs into action.

At least they’re efficient.

Birgit and her team takes the teacher with them, because Everett wants to know what’s going on. The Avenger tries to make it clear that he wants to speak with Everett personally, but the cops show up, and Birgit leaves him to handle it.

The Avenger does, leading to this.

Suck it, Angus.

The Avenger convinces the cops to let him handle the teacher, Angus realizes he now needs a new target and Hired shows up with new information.

Turns out the people going crazy all over town does have one more thing in common.

Microchips in the brain!

The Avenger is now pissed, and takes the short route to Everett’s office. 

Straight through the window.

He ties up Birgit and orders her to talk. She snarks at his tough guy routine, but does talk.

The chips are from an old project, made during Everett’s “everything can be a weapon” phase. The chips controls people’s behaviors, making them perform certain actions. Remote controlled suicide bombers, basically. Though, less on the suicide part.

Unfortunately, Everett is just too busy to deal with this himself, so Birgit got the job, and as far as she can tell, there’s one left.

Who could have seen this coming?!

The Avenger decides to go alone at first, but when Birgit tells him he has until 18.00, at which point Hired will blow up a building, he decides to accept some help.

He leaves and Birgit notes to herself that her mom always did think she could have been an actress. In case you were still under the impression this wasn’t some kind of set up.

They barge into Hired’s office, terrifying his secretary. The Avenger leads them down to the archives, but to avoid potentially causing Hired to set off the bomb early, the Avenger sneaks in through the airvents.

Unfortunately, going too close to Hired causes him to threaten to blow the bomb right there and then. Backing off calms him down, but that leaves them with the problem of how to stop him.

Birgit, having entered the archives properly now, wants to do it the easy way and shoot him. The Avenger refuses to sacrifice anyone to Everett’s craziness. They then proceed to argue until time runs out.

Saved by slow human reflexes!

The day is saved, Birgit will take Hired with her to get the chip removed and he’ll remember nothing. The Avenger is okay with this, because… the fight with Everett is a private one, I guess? He’s still angry though, and tells Birgit he hopes Everett will stay out of his way from now on. She argues that the Avenger is in Everett’s way, but suggests they put that aside to celebrate.

The Avenger turns her down, as the last few days lack of sleep is catching up to him.

Back at the tower, Birgit changes back into her business suit, feeling rather satisfied with herself. Great mission results and no losses this time. It’s a win.

She finds Everett in his office, reporting that the mission went great. Everett says he had no doubt, but remarks on the broken window. But it’s all just details.

Birgit is a bit insulted by that, not considering her mission a detail, and Everett agrees. It was all part of a greater plan. He then asks Anymore Boring how his job went, and Anymore reports that it’s done. Whatever was up with those antennas, they’re now ready.

A shame we never got to see you two really work together.

Everett tells them to go back to their ordinary jobs, unless Birgit has questions. She does. Like why she has to distract the Avenger for two days, while Anymore does his job? The last part she only said in her head, but Everett responds by saying that Anymore’s work is just as important as hers, and sends her away.

She goes, not liking the feeling that sometimes, it’s like Everett can read her thoughts.

We know. You already said that in #1.